The Challenge

My job offers me the unique gift of getting to know my patients very well. Because we see them on a 30-day schedule, I interact with most of them at least once a month, if not more. Many of them offer to me their stories of success and also of failure in health, relationships, jobs, finances- you name it, I usually hear about it. I often leave work full to the brim with the experiences of my clients. I am often left to ponder my own privilege and life experiences in the context of theirs. I spend a lot of time trying to immerse myself in this reflection personally, with my housemates, and with those I serve.

I recently decided to embark on a personal simple living challenge to explore some areas of my privilege more fully. Many of my patients live on fixed incomes. Often times the end of the month poses a challenge financially. This manifests itself in my experience in multiple ways. The food pantry and meal service that shares our space on Wednesdays is overflowing at the end of the month, many people cancel their appointments because they can't afford bus fare, and lastly I have an especially difficult time getting a hold of patients who have to turn off their phones at the end of the month because they can no longer afford to pay for the minutes. 

I decided last month, as an effort in solidarity that I too would turn my phone off the last week of the month. This proved to be a much different experience than I had expected. I told most people who I talk to regularly on Monday night that they could reach me on the clinic phone or my house land-line if there was some kind of emergency. The response varied among those I told of my challenge. The response I wasn't expecting was one that asked that I do not participate in this challenge and to please keep my phone turned on. I reluctantly turned it back on and was inundated with various alerts.

My initial response was disappointment. I had been looking forward to this challenge for weeks. My next response was to think a lot about the role technology plays in making sure we are always available to people's needs. We have become a society of instant gratification..forcing ourselves and each other to be constantly connected. Is it is really neccessary? Or has it become a kind of security blanket for us to know we can always reach someone?

My last response asks me to question how I treat those people I serve whom I can't get a hold of whenever I want to. This challenge happened during a week where I had to respond to a critical issue with one of our patients. He did not have a cell phone and is living at a shelter in the city. My inability to get a hold of him right away meant I had to drive to where he was staying after hours and deliver the message in person. As I was driving there, I realized that I was really angry that I had to drive there. How interesting that I so quickly forgot what I had attempted to do this week. I was quick to think negatively of this person for not having a privilege I had become too accustomed to having.

The disappointment has worn off. I now feel empowered to change my perspective slightly and remember to remain grateful for my constant blessings and privilege.