Connection

I've come to realize in my haste to blog the past two weeks that I never really explained the title of my blog. One of the mottos or catchphrases of JVC is that after a year of service you will be "ruined for life". Before I started my year, I had heard this phrase used about my Jesuit education at SU, and often joked about it in conversation with friends. After a month here, I have definitely come to understand it in a whole new way. The impact of the stories I hear, friendships I have formed, and things I have learned have impacted me in a very permanent way. I often find myself projecting what I've learned so far into the years of my life that will follow this one. I know the year has just begun, but I'm fairly certain that my life is beginning to be shaped and "ruined" by what I've learned in Milwaukee. More on that later I'm sure I shouldn't get too ahead of myself.

I spend more time reading this year (finally!), and recently came across a passage in my book that articulated some of this learning and ruining much better than I ever could. The author writes that he feels,

"grateful for the world which purposefully puts divisions in place so that we can overcome them, feeling the joy of getting closer, even if deep down we can never forget the sadness of our insurmountable differences"- The History of Love

This passage made me stop and think about many of the connections that I have made here in Milwaukee. As I mentioned in my last post, I have spent a lot of energy so far shifting my perspective to one of permanent gratitude. It is easy to become overwhelmed by the difficulty of creating connections with another person. I know I struggle with this daily at work trying to connect to patients who have struggles unlike any I have ever experienced. This exhausts me at the end of the work day, and then carries over into going home and building community with 7 other people. It has felt at times like an insurmountable task that will be a permanent struggle for me.

But through the exhaustion, there really is so much joy in overcoming division and connecting to another person. This month has had no shortage of this joy. 

I think it is important to pay attention to the second half of this passage as well, especially in the context of service to marginalized populations. In building connection, it is also important to remember that there are many ways that I will never be able to relate or connect with my clients. It would be naive of me to expect a deep and intimate connection with everyone I serve this year. But, that in no way should distract me from the gratitude that accompanies overcoming divisions and the joy is present in connection. 

Today is the beginning of another week where I hope to live and act in a deep sense of gratitude. Be it for divisions or connections, as both are part of the beauty of building community. 

Happy September! Sending all my love.